why cant i be 'merry'

merry christmas..
i love christmas..
but this year why cant i feel merry and happy for it?
i seem lost in this great season..
im not happy bout it..im not excited bout it anymore..
i miss last year's christmas..really miss..
surrounded by my forever best friends..wendy and daryl..
but this year three of us just seperate apart..
and even harder..my family will go to Hat Yai for holiday..and i will stay back at here..ALONE!!
not a good day for me..T.T
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